I Was Thinking... How Did I Get Here?

Once you reach a certain age, each birthday ignites more introspection. Maybe it is because you don’t know how many more birthdays you have yet to celebrate. A common thought that often surfaces is, how did I get to be this age? I remember my grandparents and even my folks reaching these milestones but not me. Yet here I am.
The fact I don’t have to get up and go to work every day should be a clue I’m no longer young. Then I remember that most large social gatherings I attend where I reacquaint with old friends and relatives are at funerals, it should also make it obvious. But I don’t feel I’m old. Yes, I do feel more aches and pains, run out of energy quicker, and enjoy naps again, but I still don’t think the number can be right. When I look at my appearance, the age seems more appropriate, but still, I just don’t “feel” that old. But age is such an individual thing.
Some people always seem old. Their posture, their movement, and their sour disposition toward life in general makes them a grumpy old man at 50. Yet others appear young at 80 because they are still planning ahead, are involved in productive activities, and embrace life despite some physical struggles that are inevitable with age.
As the decades pile up, so do your life experiences. You become a combination of the ages you went through. First, at childhood everything was new and everyone else was old.
Even if that time was 50, 60, or 70 years ago, you still have vivid memories of those early years. One of the greatest desires of that time was to “grow up.” Then came the teens, a time of excitement and turmoil. New firsts, new challenges, and parents who were so old fashioned. The teens brought different kinds of relationships, and the thrill and heartbreak that they entail. During this phase, you felt much older and smarter than your age. You also caused your parents to age much faster.
While you couldn’t wait to be 21 and a real adult, the whole decade went by in a flash. There were so many changes. Being on your own, finding a job, getting married, having children, and having the energy to do it all and still go out and have fun.
The thirties took their toll. You really weren’t a kid anymore. You had responsibilities, mortgages, kids to raise, and duties at work. You had become an adult. Then the forties arrived way too quickly. It was then that you got your first “over the hill” birthday card. Almost all the professional athletes were now younger than you. You no longer listened to pop music. You also had teenagers of your own, so you definitely were no longer cool.
As you entered the 50s and 60s, your planning for the future took on a new twist. You began to worry about your parents and wondered what life would be like when your own kids were gone. New questions had to be answered. How much longer will I keep working? Will I have enough set aside to retire? It was then you became qualified for senior discounts and received an AARP card.
Seventy was the first, “HOW DID THIS HAPPEN” moment. Life had flown by and here you were. Your identity was no longer connected to a job or being a parent. If you were lucky, you had found new challenges, adventures, or interests. Keeping or developing new social relationships were important in establishing a feeling of belonging. New struggles occurred and how you approached each of them defined what kind of old person you would become.
I’m still amazed how quickly I reached my current age. All the phases, experiences, and memories got me here, but when I look back, everything must have been moving at fast forward speed.
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PHOTO: Ron Albright