I Was Thinking... Aunt Rosie

Last fall, I accompanied a friend of mine to visit his Aunt Rosie in an assisted living facility in Mason City. I had met this extraordinary woman once before and was taken in by her positive attitude and zest for life. What is even more amazing, is that Rosie suffers from a form of dementia where she has very limited short-term memory.

Although she has been living in this cheerful facility for some time, she still needs help negotiating the path from her room to the dining room. Yet, despite the fact that at the end of the day, Rosie probably wouldn’t remember who I was or that we’d even been there, it still was a very special experience.

With Valentine’s Day just past, this is also a love story.

Dan is Rosie’s nephew and her caretaker. He sees her bills are paid and that she has an ample supply of chocolates whenever he visits. While Rosie couldn’t tell you what she did that morning, when Dan entered her room, there was instant recognition of him. There is an honest affection between these two people who have seen their roles reversed.

During the several hours we visited Rosie, she repeatedly told me what a “peach” Dan was. Aunt Rosie and Uncle Robert occasionally had taken care of Dan when he was a child, and now it was Dan’s responsibility to take care of her. It was a job he had been willingly doing for some time.

While Dan busied himself checking the inventory of Rosie’s small apartment to assess what he might need to bring next time, I was able to just chat with her. She had to ask a couple of times how I knew Dan but seemed satisfied enough to continue our conversation.

Her apartment was a marvelous clutter of art. She and her husband had both been artists. She told me how they had met at the Kansas City Art Institute in Kansas City, Mo. Robert was a painter, and she was a potter. The walls were covered with his paintings and tables were adorned with a variety of her pottery. Other projects completed or in progress added to the artistic atmosphere.

As we visited, she confided to Dan she just couldn’t remember things anymore and it bothered her since she’d always been sharp. When a staff member checked to see if we wanted to eat dinner with her, Rosie greeted her warmly but couldn’t tell us her name. Yet Rosie charmed her way through the fog and endeared herself to all those around her.

When Dan had to check with the staff about medication and take care of financial matters, Rosie and I continued talking. Dan had said Rosie and Robert had both taught at the MacNider Art Museum in Mason City, so I asked her about it. Although it had been many years since she’d taught there, her memories of some of her classes and students were vivid.

I admired several of the pottery pieces and Rosie explained in detail the process she had used to create them. Certain memories had not faded away and were still vibrant and made for interesting dialog.

Rosie is soon to be 95 and uses a walker to get around. She doesn’t do much art anymore, but it still surrounds her.

That evening she probably forgot we had been there. While some would question her quality of life, you would just need to talk with her a while and see the sparkle in her eye to know she still has memories to share. And she’ll be happy to see Dan on his next visit because he is a “peach”.

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Photo: I was thinking Ron Albright